It’s hard picking out an cute outfit for a date. It’s important to look flirty but not slutty, sexy yet sophisticated. It’s important to leave a great impression and to pick an outfit that will allow you the flexibility to do varied things on your date.
My biggest tip is ALWAYS bring flats and a ponytail holder. High heels obviously give a streamlined look and add emphasis to your sculpted calfs but they scream high maintenance and are hard to maneuver in. Try to stay away from outfits that are too complicated or trendy. Save the leather jogging pants and harness belts for girl’s night out. Men are simple and enjoy relatable fashion. You’d be surprised at how many love jeans/leggings and a great comfy sweater.
Below are some examples of my favourite date worthy options! Happy dating and please share what you plan to wear on your next date!
“Create boundaries so that people don’t come into your life behaving badly. Boundaries! When to say yes and when to say no. If you know how to and enjoy to and have a FIRM hand on saying “NO”, put your hand [up]. Boundaries require that you have a STRONG “NO”. A “no” that will PROTECT you. A “no” that will SUPPORT you. A “no” that will ADVANCE your “yes”! Because if you have a weak “no”, you’re GOING to have a weak “yes”. You’ll say “yes” because you feel obligated. You’ll say “yes” because you feel responsible. You’ll say “yes” because you don’t want to upset people. But when you have a STRONG no about what you will do, what you won’t do about your boundaries, when you’re clear about who you BE and what you’re up to and your purpose in the world, you’ll have a REAL strong no. You gotta have a strong “no”. You’ve got to build it from the inside out, so you don’t say YES to things that you’re not clear about, that don’t honor who you BE, that don’t honor the things that you value. It’s up to you. Your no will SAVE you. Be clear. Be authentic. BE authentic.”
Your mate can and will change you. I remember watching “Love Jones” and remarking on how Nia and Larenz’s characters took the best and worst from each other. Larenz opened her up to Jazz and reggae dancing and Nia picked up smoking from him.
It’s very important to take the best out of your mate and veer away from their habits that might be destructive. I sometimes struggle with morphing and adapting into whatever interests my boyfriend has. I’ve dated guys who love Nascar, Comic Books, and Thrifting and I’ve picked up these habits. Some of these habits lasted as long as the relationship and some have become a part of me. I love that I’ve dated men who are cultured and have had experiences that I’ve been able to learn from. That’s why dating is so important, if he wants to take you somewhere new or non-traditional like rock climbing instead of dinner and movie GO! You may be missing out on true love because it’s not packaged the way you expected it to be. Just be wise in letting go when his/her life choices don’t hold up to your moral guidelines.
I would love to know your opinions on the following questions:
1) Would you date a smoker?
2) Would you date a atheist?
3) Would you date someone who was overweight?
4) What’s the BEST date you’ve ever been on?
Happy Dating! Check back & share the page! I also give love advice, nothing is off limits;)
I can’t stop playing this song!
I wasn’t raised in an abusive home. My now divorced parents never fought, they were more passive aggressive with one another and yet I still fell in love with a man who verbally and physically abused me. I loved him, I was faithfully blind to him. I never questioned why he felt it necessary to yell and scream at me when he felt that I had broken one of his many rules or why he was so comfortable choking or slapping me in fits of anger.
He was a bit older, a master manipulator and great at playing on my insecurities. I’m embarrassed to admit that I adored him and I spent years trying to make him love me. I think sometimes the media shows a severe side of abusive but they don’t give any credence to the tiny fractures of abusive. Looking back there was times when I saw red flags but I ignored them because I wasn’t bloodied by his fists.
Some of the warning signs were him refusing to acknowledge my birthday, Christmas or any special occasion. He made me feel like I wasn’t worthy to be celebrated. The way he criticized my clothing, he loved calling me a “whore” when in fact I dressed very conservatively. Those are the things I wish a guidance counsellor, peer or parent had warned me about. I thought it was normal and tried to be quiet and good because I believed he would reward me with kindness.
He never did and thank God I finally left him and vowed to never be in a relationship where I was disrespected. I saw him recently and he apologized for being abusive both physically and verbally. It really touched me that he saw the errors of his ways and was man enough to admit his wrongs.
So my advice is: Don’t wait until he starts pushing and slapping you. If he’s rude, short or disrespectful to you LEAVE. It’s not your job to fix anyone and if they can’t love you for who you are they don’t need to be in your life.
Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? If you’d like to share your story email me or leave your experience in the comment section
Love & Light
I’ve been asked why I call myself “The Reluctant Wife” and after much contemplation I think I’ve come up with a concise answer.
To be blunt, I’m afraid to be a wife. I’ve dated amazing guys, who have treated me very well but every time we get to the place in our relationship where we have to talk about taking the next step….I bolt. The thought of sharing my life with someone terrifies me. I don’t want the person that I love to see my flaws and warts but I always tend to date and attract guys who are serious and want to settle down. My lack of commitment has cost me much and I’m trying slowly to self-heal and climb outside this emotional sink hole that I’ve made.
I’m also a child of divorce and after years of thinking that I handled my parents divorce well, it was brought to my attention that I haven’t forgiven my Dad. Yup, I’m the woman who has Daddy issues who takes it out on the men she dates. I’m also shocked that I just typed that but I’m not going to erase it, because I want to be transparent and it’s a major step in my healing process. So, that’s a little bit about me and a huge thank you to all of you who read this blog. Over the next few weeks I plan to write about divorce, bad boys, cougars and feeling sexy!
Are you afraid to commit? What’s your biggest fear about settling down?
Much love and happy dating!!!